Southbound Sickboy … Kraków Mass Tourism Madness

Southbound Sickboy …. Kraków Mass Tourism Madness// Day 17
Deutscheleitkulturblog by Christian Raum
Berlin/Kraków 5. September 2017

Looking around. Kraków is overrun by tourists. Following six days on empty roads I am excited to watch. There is music on the streets.

I had some very quiet moments with a candle and memories of my lost friend back home inside the Parafia p.w. Św. Katarzyny Aleksandryjskieja. And there is all this hectic and massive mad mass tourist fever outside.

Visiting the 12 Apostels in front of Peter and Paul was crucial. Kraków Meridian arrived. Measures made… sitting… relaxing. Target reached. What’s next?

A woman singing. Posters advertising cheap tours to Ausschwitz Deadcamp. A horse coach taktakraking along. There is a pilgrim sitting next to the Cathedral. Having a sardines dinner out of the tin. A fat man passing. Cursing with his ice cream…

„Why are you so sticky, you arsehole. Why are you melting that fast… can you not wait until eaten“.
A grim look at the ice in his hand.
„Who filled you inside this stupid wafer anyway? This looks like oil industry by product.“
The soft ice softing in his hands.
„Look at my trousers. There are two spots. I make you responsible for this.“
Indeed. Icecream everywhere. On his hands. His shirts. His trousers.
„My hand. Look at my hand. Oh dear my good old hand!“
Holding the icecream in his left hand now. Licking his right hand clean.
Arguing with his left hand: „Why are you holding this now. Idiot! Is it not enough if your brother is bloody sticky?“

The icecream very sad now. It assembled two big sweet sticky vanilla tears and let them drop right on man’s shoes. Man shouting „Idiot. ARSEHOLE!“ Holding the wafer high and far away from his shirt, shoes, trousers.

Melted ice flowing down his arm. The first wasp arrived. Attracted by the sweet vanilla aroma. He waving with his sticky fingers.
„Go away beasty insect! Go away you bloody fucking insect! I will kill you…kill you“ Ice cream in his face and hair. Walking over to the garbage. Throw Ice cream in. Than cueing to buy a new one.

Leaving stage. Applause.

Watching next actors arriving. Stage taken by a family performing a family discussion thing. „What we have for dinner, Leute. Pizza? Doner Kebab? Burger and Fries? Pierogi?“

Kids:“We want Doner!!“
Father: „We can have Doner in Berlin. Much better at home. We eat Pierogi.“
Kids crying: „No no. We want Doner Doner Doner!!!“
Mother: „They may have Doner if they want…“
Father: „Pierogi!!“

My suggestion was icecream. Than I strolled further down to the river.



THANKS to MISTER „Ninty miles an hour, girl, is the speed I drive“ SICKBOY!!! My old shipmate… 🙂

Editors: Christian Raum, Christin Hohmeier







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